Only forgiveness will protect your heart from the destruction that bitterness will cause.
Bitterness destroys the vessel that contains it. Jesus showed us how to forgive by being the first
example Romans 5:8

Greek words
• 5483. charizomai -- to show favor, give freely
• 863. aphiemi -- to send away, leave alone, permit
• 2433. hilaskomai -- to be propitious, make propitiation for
• 630. apoluo -- to set free, release
• 859. aphesis -- dismissal, release, fig. pardon
• 1943. epikalupto -- to cover over or up
The English word forgive has two parts. The first part of the word is “fore” which means first,
beforehand, in advance of. The second part is “give” which means to impart a gift, give for free,
or let go of as a gift. The two put together would be to give freely in advance. In some
languages there is no word or understanding of the word forgive!

To Give Before:

• It is made right!
• It is asked for!
• It is deserved!
• I feel like it!
• I see change!

• The Sun goes down that day!
• I go to sleep!
• Tomorrow!
• Before I want to!
• Into the future!
Your genuine forgiveness must:

• Focus only on you, the one forgiving!
• Understand that it is an issue between to you and God, not you and your offender.
• Duplicate the way Christ first forgave you!
• Scripture “If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive
you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.” Matthew
6:14-15 NLT
• Scripture “bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a
complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do.” Colossians
3:13 NKJV

• In this verse forebear means to bear with and pass over.
• Example: Scripture; “Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they
are doing.” And the soldiers gambled for his clothes by throwing dice.” Luke 23:34 NLT
• Example: Stephen: Scripture; “He fell to his knees, shouting, “Lord, don’t charge them
with this sin!” And with that, he died.” Acts of the Apostles 7:60 NLT
• A grudge can limit a miracle.
• Scripture; “But when you are praying, first forgive anyone you are holding a grudge
against, so that your Father in heaven will forgive your sins, too.” Mark 11:25 NLT.
• Not desire to change them!
• Stop bad thoughts against them!
• Give up all hard feelings at or toward them!
• Give up all desire for revenge!
• Be willing to be in a relationship with them! (Trust God, rather than others.)
• Take the focus off of their need to repay or make it right!
• Focus on your willingness to make right the wrong in forgiving!
• Willingly live with the consequence of their sin!
• Be willing to become a substitute and suffer the penalty owed!
• Never bring up their sin once forgiven!
• Give up the desire to share the story with everyone.
• Re-forgive if you do bring up the offender's sin after original Forgiveness.
• Be willing to pray for them!
• Give details: Jesus as Judge, prisoner, and death row inmate. Think of yourself as in a
courtroom and the bailiff says “All rise honorable Judge Jesus Christ presiding.” As Jesus
comes into the courtroom in his black robe he sits down at the bench with a gavel in his
hand. You are brought before the judge and made to swear to tell the truth the whole
truth and nothing but the truth so help me God. All evidence of sin is brought against
you, Jesus deliberates, and you’re found guilty, the sentence is death. Then Jesus rises
from the bench and takes off his black robe and underneath he has prison clothes he comes
around in front of the bench where you are and moves you to the side and takes your
place. He prepares himself for the death sentence that he just pronounced. This is a
picture of what forgiveness Jesus gave each of us.
• Give details: List a $ value of all the pain words your offender caused you.........then get
your checkbook out and pay the full amount yourself. Definition of Forgiveness.
• Give details: The Lord's Prayer, Father forgive me the way I forgive My Spouse.
Matthew 18:32-35

Whole Families, Inc. Copyright 2012 Bradley Reinke all rights reserved. Principle of Forgiveness

“Then the king called in the man he had forgiven and said, ‘You evil servant! I forgave you that
tremendous debt because you pleaded with me. Shouldn’t you have mercy on your fellow
servant, just as I had mercy on you?’ Then the angry king sent the man to prison to be tortured
until he had paid his entire debt. “That’s what my heavenly Father will do to you if you refuse
to forgive your brothers and sisters from your heart.” Matthew 18:32-35 NLT

           Self Esteem vs Christ Esteem

Who are you in your self-talk?
Who do you believe yourself to be in your thoughts?
You are a child of God.
You have the inheritance of God’s son.
Who the Bible says you are is more true than anything you believe about yourself.
If what you believe about yourself does not line up with the written Word of God they are lies,
probably placed there by the enemy.
On the list of people that you love dearly how far down is your name? You must love yourself to
carry out the Word of God when it says love your neighbor as yourself.
What you believe is how you will treat yourself.
Correct the lies you are believing about yourself.
Understand that the enemy does not have full knowledge of your mind and is under no
obligation to obey your thoughts. He can only place thoughts there like he did for Judas then Judas
acted on the thought and it became sin.
We must choose every thought wisely because our emotions will follow what we have been
thinking about.
Understand stress is your body‘s reaction to what you’re thinking about.
Not only is forgiveness of great importance but also your Christ esteem.
We are told to take every thought captive and make it obey Jesus Christ “We destroy every
proud obstacle that keeps people from knowing God. We capture their rebellious thoughts and
teach them to obey Christ.” 2 Corinthians 10:5 NLT?
And also in Philippians four verse eight to think on these things. “And now, dear brothers and
sisters, one final thing. Scripture; Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right,
and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.”
Philippians 4:8 NLT
Become the person who God says you are for only his approval.